To "assume" makes an ass of u and me!

This post is more about life observation than aikido but it can apply in the dojo...

On the 10 minute walk to work in the morning from Glasgow Central to the City Chambers, I pass at least 4 beggars and homeless people. I walk past quickly because I'm afraid to think too much. It's shameful of me but I'd get upset otherwise. If I do let my thoughts wonder a bit then it's always about my lack of understanding. How did these people get into their predicaments? How tragic that they don't have family and friends to go to for help.

One day last week a few of my colleagues and I got into a discussion about the reports in the media and how one beggar was making hundreds of pounds a day. One of the managers advised us not to give the beggars in the city centre any money because it's all run by criminal gangs and it's the gang bosses that keep the money.

So all beggars are rich and are fuelling gang crime...

Uh huh.

As some things in life have a habit of tying together, I read an article in the company magazine by a lady who had been rushing to catch her train home one day. She chose her seat and settled down to read her book. To her irritation, a drunk man sat opposite her. Dirty and stinking of booze he confirmed he'd been out since the night before and was moguered. The lady was disgusted and plotted her escape to another seat. But as it turned out, "Jimmy" was a good laugh and had a fair but of banter going with most of the passengers around him.

When they got to their destination, the lady bid the man farewell and advised him to go home for a good sleep. "That I will Mrs," he said, "got the all clear this morning. Haven't slept properly for nearly a year!"

Suddenly, Jimmy was no longer the dirty drunken ass who everyone tried to avoid. Suddenly, Jimmy was a strong human being who had just beaten cancer!

Just goes to show that our judgements and assumptions can be way off the truth.

Have the courage to be softer

Sensei often teaches us about softness in our techniques. You don't have to be strong and aggressive in aikido.  In fact, being soft in your technique and using Ki makes your actions more powerful.  I came across a beautiful poem through a friend on Facebook and part of it is very relevant to the above point.

"So often it seems like the answer must be to toughen up. Get a thicker skin. Become harder. Meaner. More aggressive.

It's not.

Maybe all we need to remember is the sweeping power of our softness.

[...]

Tenderness is wisdom; gentleness is strengh; sensitivity is gold."

Sarah L Harvey

The article below is by the same author. A beautiful peace of writing that talks about having courage to relax:

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2016/05/this-is-courage-the-breathtaking-bravery-in-relaxation/

Enjoy!

Etiquette please

I was reading an article the other day (can't remember who wrote it and why I came across it) which was discussing the "death of the martial artist". With the rise of competitive sports and the increasingly televised Ultimate Fighting Champion (UFC), the writer had observed that the respectful, peaceful , disciplined martial artist no longer exists.

I'm assuming this observation is based in America as I don't think UFC is as big here as it is there (although, as always, we'll no doubt catch up). But I do think that it's a sad state of affairs.

The peace and discipline of the dojo is a welcome change in a world of stress, problem solving, conflict and bad news.

I like the fact that "what sensei says, goes!" and that this is respected. It means I don't have to negotiate for the umpteenth time that day. I like that I don't have to compete with other students after tumbling around a competitive business environment all day. Or, even worse, resisting the temptation to compete with other parents! I like that there are rules and etiquette to follow because then I know exactly what's expected of me. Comments are never underhanded and tests aren't sprung on us.

If these qualities of martial arts is dissipating in favour of competition and profit then it just becomes a part of the every day grind of life. Nothing special.

In this constantly connected, fast paced, demanding world, I only hope that people will continue to appreciate the spirit of martial arts.

Lifting the block

I have to say that I've come up against a bit of writer's block recently.  I leave class each Tuesday thinking "that thing that sensei said was really interesting... I'll write about that." I then start a blog post and I either get stumped after one sentence or I think about it too much and the post is just a big ramble of nonsense.

I have about 10 draft posts sitting on my blogger dashboard and none of them are finished!

I think my mind has been consumed by the new chapter in my life - I'm now a working mother! Going back to work was hard. I'll be honest, ki breathing went out the window. Focusing on one point went out the window. Relaxing with weight underside didn't even get a chance! And because I was hyper anxious, so was Joseph which meant nobody slept for about a week before my first day back! There were tears, tantrums and snotters. And that was just me!

In class yesterday, 2 of the brown belts were practicing kiatsu for most of the class because one of them has a bad back. I have no shame in admitting my jealousy! My back hasn't been the same since the third trimester of pregnancy and I'd actually forgotten about kiatsu so I was longing for someone to channel some energy into my tired aching muscles.

I could have done a little happy dance when sensei gave the rest of us time to do it at the end of class. It's hard to describe the effects of kiatsu but I'd go as far as to say it's even better than a massage. You come away from it feeling so relaxed and light and at peace... It's just lovely.

My sister would say something along the lines of "I haven't got time for this voodoo nonsense" and there are a lot of people who will turn their backs on alternative healing. I come from a scientific family so many of them switch off when I start talking about Ki and the power of the mind.

But last night... that was exactly what I needed. We didn't have long but it was so wonderful to stop. Just to stop. Breathe. Feel the energy. Let it sink into the body and feel that tension ebb away.

And I sit here in my rocking chair with wee Joseph sleeping peacefully, grateful for the healing energy my partner gave me. Grateful for the opportunity to get my focus back. To just be me. A busy, dedicated, fun, sometimes loopy, hard working, loving mum and wife. Bring it on!